I’m not perfect

A fact I know too well

So there’s no need

For you to rub it in my face

To make me feel bad

Guilty

To antagonize me

With hateful words and accusations

And try and pretend

That I’m the one

Who needs to apologize,

Take on all the blame

Because you’re not perfect, either

Far from it, in fact

You’re mean

Rigid

Cold

And I don’t think

You even realize it

So maybe you should

Point that finger at yourself

Analyze your behavior

Acknowledge that I did my best

Tried my hardest

Gave you as much as I could

And maybe you asked for too much

I’m not a magician

And I’m not a mindreader

I can’t be expected to do everything

And I can’t be expected

To know what I haven’t been told

Get off your high horse

Accept responsibility for yourself

I’ll accept responsibility for me

And let’s call it quits

Because I’m sick of torturing myself

Of going to bed

With the words I should have said

Stuck in my mind

Haunting, taunting me

I hate hating myself

And having someone out in the world

Hating me

But you don’t hate yourself,

Do you?

You have righteous anger,

Right?

I’m so mad I want to pull my hair out

You think I should be groveling at your feet

But I won’t

Even though part of me wants to

Because there’s a part of me

That hates this feeling so much

I’d rather do whatever it takes

To make you forgive me

For something I didn’t even do wrong

Than go on feeling so shitty

All the time

It’s not fair

It’s not fair

It’s not fair